Sunday, April 01, 2012
Ann and I are organizing a special "Passover Experience" next weekend to commemorate our heritage. We are starting a new tradition of an authentic re-enactment of the Passover story. This is the first attempt in the modern era to replicate in true historic fashion what it was like for our people when they left Israel as slaves and entered the desert as a free, wandering people.
Preparations will begin in Israel. We have arranged for a free charter flight from JFK to Tel Aviv, courtesy of Manischewitz, who will also provide in flight catering. We have room for 36 people, and there are still have a few spots left. Please consider joining us, and RSVP immediately if you can make it. Gentiles are welcome as well! If you haven't had horseradish or matzo balls at 38,000 feet, you have no idea what you're missing.
Given the unfortunate political climate in Egypt right now, and the likelihood that names such as Avi Rubin and Haim Jewburger may be greeted with hostility by the Muslim Brotherhood, the first stop will be to an office in Be'er Sheva that will issue us all legitimate looking credentials with Egyptian sounding names. (I have to get used to answering to Mustafa.) The next 3 hours will be spent memorizing our new identities and our cover stories, and we will participate in a two hour crash military boot camp. Those who need it will be given voice coaching to make them sound less Jewish, and we can adjust skin tones with makeup, as needed.
How this trip is different from all other trips? It will become obvious as you view this itinerary:
April 5; DAY 1
Departure: Non-stop flight JFK -> Tel Aviv
April 6; DAY 2
9:25 a.m. arrive at Ben Gurion Airport*
10:30 a.m. shuttle to Be'er Sheva secret office
Noon Lunch, followed by fake ID photo session and receive cover stories
3:00 p.m. cover story training and checkpoint survival instruction
8:00 p.m. insertion into Egypt at the site of an ancient pyramid
10:00 p.m. quiet Seder dinner at the foot of the pyramids
Midnight: Transport to Suez, where we will search for the afikoman
* After the long flight and all that matzo, all participants will be offered courtesy enemas upon arrival.
April 7; DAY 3
8:00 a.m. - 10:30 a.m. Slaughter a goat and mark house entrances with the blood
10:30 - noon Release frogs and locust in the streets (we will pack these in Be'er Sheva)
Noon: Kosher lunch in Cairo
2:00 p.m. Shuttle to the red sea, bring bathing suit just in case
6:13 p.m. Parting of the red sea (haven't figured this one out yet - stay tuned!)
9:00 p.m. Enter Sinai dessert for 40 minute walk representing years in the desert
April 8; DAY 4
Free day on your own in Sinai Desert
April 9; DAY 5
Non-stop flight Tel Aviv -> JFK for whoever makes it back
If this goes well, please stay tuned for other reenactments. I'm thinking of organizing a Purim one in Iran next March, if we can find a good spot for a hanging, and perhaps a Hanukkah one in Greece, where we can seek out descendants of Antiochus to attack. Or, maybe the best one would be an April Fools Day reenactment in Chelm.